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"In My Mind" is a single by Amanda Palmer from her album Amanda Palmer Goes Down Under and is featured in Episode 4 of Life is Strange, heard when Max Caulfield returns from the alternative timeline and finds herself in the room of Chloe Price.

LyricsEdit

In a future five years from now
I'm one hundred and twenty pounds
And I never get hung over
Because I will be the picture of discipline
Never minding what state I'm in
And I will be someone I admire
And it's funny how I imagined
That I would be that person now
But it does not seem to have happened
Maybe I've just forgotten how to see
That I am not exactly the person that I thought I'd be
And in my mind
In the faraway here and now
I've become in control somehow
And I never lose my wallet
Because I will be the picture of discipline
Never fucking up anything
And I'll be a good defensive driver
And it's funny how I imagined
That I would be that person now
But it does not seem to have happened
Maybe I've just forgotten how to see
That I'll never be the person that I thought I'd be
And in my mind
When I'm old I am beautiful
Planting tulips and vegetables
Which I will mindfully watch over
Not like me now
I'm so busy with everything
That I don't look at anything
But I'm sure I'll look when I am older
And it's funny how I imagined
That I could be that person now
But that's not what I want
But that's what I wanted
And I'd be giving up somehow
How strange to see
That I don't wanna be the person that I want to be
And in my mind
I imagine so many things
Things that aren't really happening
And when they put me in the ground
I'll start pounding the lid
Saying I haven't finished yet
I still have a tattoo to get
That says I'm living in the moment
And it's funny how I imagined
That I could win this, win this fight
But maybe it isn't all that funny
That I've been fighting all my life
But maybe I have to think it's funny
If I wanna live before I die
And maybe it's funniest of all
To think I'll die before I actually see
That I am exactly the person that I want to be
Fuck yes
I am exactly the person that I want to be

Videos Edit

Interpretation Edit

It seems this song has been chosen precisely because of its lyrics:

  • "In a future five years from now" coincides perfectly with what happened to Max: she just traveled in time from 2008 to 2013 or, to put it another way, five years.
  • "I will be the picture of discipline", "In the faraway here and now I've become in control somehow". Max wants to be the best person possible and be in control of her powers: she thinks she can "twist time around her fingers" and save William with impunity.
  • "And it's funny how I imagined / That I would be that person now / But it does not seem to have happened / Maybe I've just forgotten how to see / That I'll never be the person that I thought I'd be". These lines could also be interpreted as Max realizing she could have turned to be a totally different person (the alternative Max) but didn't. It could also be interpreted as Max understanding she could never be the person she wanted to be, that is to say the "normal" Max but still friend with Chloe and with William alive (which was her original plan).
  • "And it's funny how I imagined that I could be that person now, but that's not what I want. But that's what I wanted." These lines can be also interpreted as Max having made a choice: she wanted to make things different by saving William, but in the end she traded her new life with her old one, not without having regrets about her failure to save William.
  • "To think I'll die before I actually see that I am exactly the person that I want to be" These lines seem to foreshadow the gruesome fate of Chloe if the player picks the saving the bay ending. On the cliff, Chloe realizes she was the one to blame for almost everything wrong in her life and admits she was self-centered but she will unfortunately die before ever realizing it (since Max came back in time to let her die in the bathroom).
  • "I still have a tattoo to get" could also be a reference to Chloe's tattoo.

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